Arhuuuumba, we have A Rum Bar…

Portside Parlour is fresh off the ideas-press, open tot eh public, and filling them with rum of all sorts. I suspect that the guys behind the place are wannabe pirates, but I can deal with that. Luckily, they don’t require you to wear a pirate hat, own a parrot, or have a peg-leg to drink here.

It’s pretty strange that this place is in the basement of another bar, Off Broadway, but I think that make it more appealing. It means going through one bar to get to another, which makes it feel a but like you’re leaving the mainstream drinkers upstairs to sup on sasprilla while you sneak down into a prohibition era speakeasy where you’ll be sneakily knock back barrels of rum.

Even when you’re down the stairs, the entrance to the rum bar is kept secret behind a toilet door. Yep, if you take a date, your first stop will be a trip to the toilet together – I can’t speak for the rest of the world but from experience, this is not an acceptable way to start a date. Rest assured though that once you’ve convinced your drinking partner to step into the loos with you, they’ll be so taken with what;s behind the door that they’ll forgive your abominable suggestion and love you forever for knowing that this cool underground place exists.

Though it’s apparently almost spring in London, it’s also guaranteed to be chilly for a few more months yet (until we get 10 days of summer in August) so we do recommend a thoroughly large dose of hot buttered rum served up in a kettle.

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